"He who laughs, lasts."
-Mary Poole
recently met the most adorable Italian girl…It all started when I was doing a sort of break dance/sign language in Spain to order a " Bocadillo" meaning a "sandwich"…the problem was not the sandwich itself but what was IN the sandwich…
Since this was the land of "jamon" meaning "ham"( and since you all probably know..we do not eat ham) I really needed to know what I was eating... you might order mussels in this country and have sprinkles of ham on it instead of lemon…This is how fanatic they were about it!!!!…
Anyway the poor girl saw I was struggling so she tried to talk to the waiter for me…between three words of Italian and a word of Spanish…I ended up with a mozzarella and cheese sandwich…hmmm…Was better off with my break dance….But this " bocadillo" moment turned to a beautiful friendship…
We both were from the same astrological sign ..were born in the same date (but different years) and thought aquarius men were the worst…(sorry to all aquarius men out there…but you guys do suck at relationships..good friends though!!!…) This is how easy female bonding is…( and how short it lasts)..
Anyway she had one of those feminine male names..That only Italians can get away with…Carlotta instead of charles…Georgia instead of George…Valentina instead of valentino…(just made that one up)…But you get my point..
After the Italian girl comes the Italian crowd…How do a single traveling 25 year old girl got to know the whole Italian society in a foreign city…???? Don't know…. But damn the girl has skills!!!!:)..
We do (as Saudis and I guess as middle easterns) when gone to a foreign country put ourselves in "Shilas" a slang word for "groups"…But the process doesn't come easily it starts with a lot of staring as you walk by…A lot of whispering…a lot of guessing of which part of the middle east you are (a decisive point to be accepted or not.. But Saudis are accepted usually everytime..hmmm maybe because they are very superficial in their relationships with others..Thus a bit snobbish..Thus wanted!!!!)
There is also a lot of who you are…and how you are dressed…A lot of your personal status.. and a lot of how many times they saw you on the same street (since in each city there is a street or a place where our khaliji friends meet and look at each other…NO…not talk to each other…NO… not to know each other…Just to look at each other and show each other off…
example: Champs elysees: Haagen Daz in Paris…Knightsbridge: Tramps or Selfridges in London…Marbella : Puerto Buenos in Spain..ect)…
When all is said…done and known…The approaching begins…you might end up with a really fun "shila" to party with…or bump into your school friends or cousins that you haven't seen back in the country (cause you didn't care) and hang out with them (cause another day with your baby brother will lead you to suicide)… or get a crap romantic experience to just prove to your girlfriends you did something different this summer and released your inhibitions ..
At the end of the day you are better off with your parents' routine…
Back to my story…The Italians were fun and after the world cup they were funner…Although it was very clear to all that I was pro- Zizou ( if we can call them the French team… since half of them are arabs and the other Jamaicans)
Anyway The thing that surprised my Italian friend regardless of the non-drinking issue…( being a good representative of my Islamic country..I made a little white lie saying that it is normal and that most of the Saudis didn't drink…) should I laugh now…or keep it for later...hmmm…now….hahahahahahaha
So like I was saying the thing that surprised my Italian friend was believe it or not…my physical appearance…Not considering myself a bomb but a girl with very typical Saudi Najdi features…(I have very cute dimples when I smile though : Masha says modestly)… I started thinking about the million Saudi drop dead gorgeous friends I have.. and what would she say if she saw them!!!!!!! Nevertheless The girl was amazed…which made me think did she ever see a saudi girl????... or a middle eastern girl for that matter???..negative…She was one of those rare Italian girls that never interacted with khalejis …and the closest she got to us was from the media…
Ok that explains it… I don't know if you ever thought about it but did you ever see a good looking Arabic man or woman in western TV or in the news.. Everybody knows that the most beautiful men and especially women are arabs..Since the beginning of time…But did you ever see one in the western news…????? There is only images of misery...war… Bearded man…old women.. and poor people....
Like in Africa…The most famous international models are ethopians or nigerians … but only famine… naked babies..and black flies are shown on the news…
The truth is the most miserable…stressed….out of work…depressed people are in the west but that doesn't show and even if it does they choose the most respectable and well presented one to talk about it…Media is an art.. a whole strategy of planning and showing..Like photography…painting…and sculpture…think about it…
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Thursday, August 10, 2006
The First Saudi Woman
"Once a harlot came upon a dog dying of thirst. Without a second thought she took off her leather sock, tied it to her veil, got water from a well nearby, and saved the animal's life. For that one act of kindness she was absolved of all her ill deeds. Indeed every deed of kindness toward living beings shall be rewarded." The Prophet Muhammad, as reported by Abu Hurairah
The other day I was going through one of those "laha" "hiya" "maha" "sama" "whatever arabic woman magazines...The cover catched my eye... first because of the superficial pose the girl had and second by the title " The First Saudi Woman to..."
ok let's take a look back at the last couple of months here in Saudi...There has been some major changes and when I say major i mean M-A-J-O-R..The most important one of course is our new king...Abdulla...He gave a great opportunity for saudi women to be more... hmmmm let's say "out there"... and God knows they weren't asked twice!!!!...BUT it is one thing to be more physically involved in the media and newspapers..It is another to be claimed the first saudi woman to do the " Lotus position"..I mean people that just sounds retarded...
and even if the major she is working in IS a new one...did the statistics actually checked the 22 million citizens (which only half of them are saudis) to know if she is actually the first saudi woman in saudi arabia (cause some of them have major careers abroad) to actually invent, invest, work, create, drive that sort of thing????...probably not...
That might come to some of you as a shock but saudi women do work...and they have been doing so for more than 50 years...in different fields..in different majors..and in different careers...Some of them have offices in different societies or positions in the biggest universities of the world...and some lucky ones have their name published in reviews or journals...But as most middle eastern women they are quite reserved about it which is a positive thing I guess...First of all it gives her a certain feminity...(She is doing all the work..job, house ,children but oh my god how could she manage without her dear amazing hard working husband?;);););)...which of course gives the men a certain ego that preserves their manhood...
and second as strong believers of the evil eye (since a lot of eyes are on us in this particular time)...we don' t want our "brains" suddenly disappearing like in Irak..do we????
The other MAJOR change was the voting for women driving in the country...(I think that was an actual international news..and the west LOVED it!!!!)..I can see them now going like: oh my god!!!! they are suffocating..it is a discrimination.. they are prisonners and dependant on their men...how can they live those poor - miserable-slowly dying -not equal with their partners women ...how could that be???? blablabla..lol...
ok I admit this is a funny one we have two women pilots but no women drivers...although we (the hajiris and other bedouin families drive in the desert all the time)...But the hilarious part is that 60% of the voters against the issue were women...lol...
It actually made me think...deeply...why??? well i guess some of them wanted to be driven around by drivers and not have to pick up chores..park..fill up the tank..change a wheel...get stuck in a traffic... while for others it is a better chance to spend more time with their husbands..he picks her up...puts her down...take her to her sis...then her mom...then her friend...then the kids...then...you got the picture...
hmmmm why not? I mean if it makes her happy...
which reminds me of an incident happening to me with a friend who just got married recently..had to meet her at the hairdresser where she goes three times and a half a week...two times for her hair and one and a half for manicure/pedicure/hammam/fatla/waxing/henna tattou..(yes it is every week...and yes it is very normal for us)....anyway...3 hours later she pops in...
I was in " kill you" mood... had 3 coffees and my hair and make up began to melt..(we had to go to a party together)...The point is I was having a nervous breaking down...
" Where have you been????"...
" on my way habibti (meaning darling).."
" three hours on your way????"
" We got lost Mo did not know the way!"
" why didn't you show him you practically LIVE here!"
" NOOOO WAYYYY!!!" she responded in shock " I made myself I did not know either!"
no comment...
The other day I was going through one of those "laha" "hiya" "maha" "sama" "whatever arabic woman magazines...The cover catched my eye... first because of the superficial pose the girl had and second by the title " The First Saudi Woman to..."
ok let's take a look back at the last couple of months here in Saudi...There has been some major changes and when I say major i mean M-A-J-O-R..The most important one of course is our new king...Abdulla...He gave a great opportunity for saudi women to be more... hmmmm let's say "out there"... and God knows they weren't asked twice!!!!...BUT it is one thing to be more physically involved in the media and newspapers..It is another to be claimed the first saudi woman to do the " Lotus position"..I mean people that just sounds retarded...
and even if the major she is working in IS a new one...did the statistics actually checked the 22 million citizens (which only half of them are saudis) to know if she is actually the first saudi woman in saudi arabia (cause some of them have major careers abroad) to actually invent, invest, work, create, drive that sort of thing????...probably not...
That might come to some of you as a shock but saudi women do work...and they have been doing so for more than 50 years...in different fields..in different majors..and in different careers...Some of them have offices in different societies or positions in the biggest universities of the world...and some lucky ones have their name published in reviews or journals...But as most middle eastern women they are quite reserved about it which is a positive thing I guess...First of all it gives her a certain feminity...(She is doing all the work..job, house ,children but oh my god how could she manage without her dear amazing hard working husband?;);););)...which of course gives the men a certain ego that preserves their manhood...
and second as strong believers of the evil eye (since a lot of eyes are on us in this particular time)...we don' t want our "brains" suddenly disappearing like in Irak..do we????
The other MAJOR change was the voting for women driving in the country...(I think that was an actual international news..and the west LOVED it!!!!)..I can see them now going like: oh my god!!!! they are suffocating..it is a discrimination.. they are prisonners and dependant on their men...how can they live those poor - miserable-slowly dying -not equal with their partners women ...how could that be???? blablabla..lol...
ok I admit this is a funny one we have two women pilots but no women drivers...although we (the hajiris and other bedouin families drive in the desert all the time)...But the hilarious part is that 60% of the voters against the issue were women...lol...
It actually made me think...deeply...why??? well i guess some of them wanted to be driven around by drivers and not have to pick up chores..park..fill up the tank..change a wheel...get stuck in a traffic... while for others it is a better chance to spend more time with their husbands..he picks her up...puts her down...take her to her sis...then her mom...then her friend...then the kids...then...you got the picture...
hmmmm why not? I mean if it makes her happy...
which reminds me of an incident happening to me with a friend who just got married recently..had to meet her at the hairdresser where she goes three times and a half a week...two times for her hair and one and a half for manicure/pedicure/hammam/fatla/waxing/henna tattou..(yes it is every week...and yes it is very normal for us)....anyway...3 hours later she pops in...
I was in " kill you" mood... had 3 coffees and my hair and make up began to melt..(we had to go to a party together)...The point is I was having a nervous breaking down...
" Where have you been????"...
" on my way habibti (meaning darling).."
" three hours on your way????"
" We got lost Mo did not know the way!"
" why didn't you show him you practically LIVE here!"
" NOOOO WAYYYY!!!" she responded in shock " I made myself I did not know either!"
no comment...
Thursday, August 03, 2006
The Golden Rule
"Life can only be understood backwards, but must be lived forwards." -Soren Kierkegaard
You people are just fantastic!!!!!!…you know just how to keep a girl blubbering on and a writer writing on...keep it up with those comments and emails…love you all xxxxxx
Today had a phone call from one of my friends…Telling me she was pregnant again…(I think this year is not only actors baby blooms season but my friend's as well…just this year I have 3 mamas on the go…) Any way she is " mashalla" meaning =God does as he wills …a mother of already 4 kids and this one( like the others) was "by accident"..or she didn't know "how that happened"…
Ok..lets make things clear!!!!!!..we don't know how we mixed sugar with salt in our "oum 3ali"…(an Arabian sweet that I urge you to try if you didn't)… we don't know how our little brother plays 4 hours in his PSP (a video game) with his eyes popping out and still have a functioning brain…we don't know how after a couple of highlights our hair color turns orange henna fluorescent after a simple contact with sea water + sun…
BUT for God's sake people… por favor... we DO know how we fell pregnant…!!!!!
Unless of course you have a minute memory like "Blue" the Fish in finding Nemo or "he" was just a minute-man… Which either way is not a very good sign…
hmmmmm….poor you..
This scenario back there is a typical female saudi/khaleji scene…
Since the beginning of time in Saudi as well as other Arabian countries…mothers passed to daughters the key to a long lasting marriage…Whether it is a happy one or not: " Bring it on " with the kids…
It reminds me so much of this chocolate kinder surprise invention…you eat the chocolate and poof here is a surprise!…poof here is another one..and another one and another!!!
Since we are not chinese ( the number is not limited) and Do love our kids to grow naturally through their phases ( Too naturally)..unlike Germans, Swiss germans, Austrians (anything that finishes with "ans") and Japanese..
It is not surprising to find a lot of newly weds to be "oh my god! How can it be..I am pregnant!" after only a couple of months…
The purpose of this Golden rule is to "enchain" the husbands to their wives…And the kids to go " Babaaaaaaa abee la3ba!" meaning "Dadddddyyyyy I want a toooooooyyyy!"…." Babaaaaaaa abee sayara!" meaning " Daddddyyyyy I want a caaaarrrr!"…." Babaaaaaaaaaaa abee zey Sarah!" meaning " Daddddyyy I want like Sarah!"…"Babaaaaaaaaa…" meaning " Dadddddddddddddyyyyyyyy!!!!"…
Of course as you can see The "Golden rule" can most of the time function positively for the wife…who can think about something else if you have a squeaking kid(s) 24/7 on your head..????
And an arab kid is NOT like any other kid… First we start as really ugly ducklings that change dramatically as we grow older…I remember a family member who did not believe that this was her newly born son…His fore head was bigger than his body and his nose was like a door slammed on his face!…she told the others to double check with the nurse..lol.. imagine "yashen weldi!!!!" meaning " my ugly son!"…lol
Well actually he turned out to be a handsome young man later on..The more we grow older the more beautiful we are…Unlike a lot of Europeans… when seeing the parents you just cannot believe that this little baby doll is their kid…But that’s how she or he will turn out to be…..like the parents..
Normal kids start talking at 1 or 2…we start yelling at 8 months…Normal kids start walking carefully around the same age…we start jumping from the top of the stairs to arrive faster to the bottom…Want to hear where the baby is in the house????.. Normal kids have a special device put for them in every room to hear them….We don't need one, just follow the sound!…In the playground normal kids stay in their own space where their mother left them with their sand bucket….we finished our castle, destroyed another kids castle, ran around the play ground, and drove our mother or filipinno nanny crazy by going out of the park and in the middle of the road…
If we applied the "calming down" pill that Americans invented for their hyper active children to our kids…We wont have anymore kids….lol..
But the "Golden rule" does not always work.. There comes a time when a man has got to go.. He's got to go ...whether he has one kid or 30…
You people are just fantastic!!!!!!…you know just how to keep a girl blubbering on and a writer writing on...keep it up with those comments and emails…love you all xxxxxx
Today had a phone call from one of my friends…Telling me she was pregnant again…(I think this year is not only actors baby blooms season but my friend's as well…just this year I have 3 mamas on the go…) Any way she is " mashalla" meaning =God does as he wills …a mother of already 4 kids and this one( like the others) was "by accident"..or she didn't know "how that happened"…
Ok..lets make things clear!!!!!!..we don't know how we mixed sugar with salt in our "oum 3ali"…(an Arabian sweet that I urge you to try if you didn't)… we don't know how our little brother plays 4 hours in his PSP (a video game) with his eyes popping out and still have a functioning brain…we don't know how after a couple of highlights our hair color turns orange henna fluorescent after a simple contact with sea water + sun…
BUT for God's sake people… por favor... we DO know how we fell pregnant…!!!!!
Unless of course you have a minute memory like "Blue" the Fish in finding Nemo or "he" was just a minute-man… Which either way is not a very good sign…
hmmmmm….poor you..
This scenario back there is a typical female saudi/khaleji scene…
Since the beginning of time in Saudi as well as other Arabian countries…mothers passed to daughters the key to a long lasting marriage…Whether it is a happy one or not: " Bring it on " with the kids…
It reminds me so much of this chocolate kinder surprise invention…you eat the chocolate and poof here is a surprise!…poof here is another one..and another one and another!!!
Since we are not chinese ( the number is not limited) and Do love our kids to grow naturally through their phases ( Too naturally)..unlike Germans, Swiss germans, Austrians (anything that finishes with "ans") and Japanese..
It is not surprising to find a lot of newly weds to be "oh my god! How can it be..I am pregnant!" after only a couple of months…
The purpose of this Golden rule is to "enchain" the husbands to their wives…And the kids to go " Babaaaaaaa abee la3ba!" meaning "Dadddddyyyyy I want a toooooooyyyy!"…." Babaaaaaaa abee sayara!" meaning " Daddddyyyyy I want a caaaarrrr!"…." Babaaaaaaaaaaa abee zey Sarah!" meaning " Daddddyyy I want like Sarah!"…"Babaaaaaaaaa…" meaning " Dadddddddddddddyyyyyyyy!!!!"…
Of course as you can see The "Golden rule" can most of the time function positively for the wife…who can think about something else if you have a squeaking kid(s) 24/7 on your head..????
And an arab kid is NOT like any other kid… First we start as really ugly ducklings that change dramatically as we grow older…I remember a family member who did not believe that this was her newly born son…His fore head was bigger than his body and his nose was like a door slammed on his face!…she told the others to double check with the nurse..lol.. imagine "yashen weldi!!!!" meaning " my ugly son!"…lol
Well actually he turned out to be a handsome young man later on..The more we grow older the more beautiful we are…Unlike a lot of Europeans… when seeing the parents you just cannot believe that this little baby doll is their kid…But that’s how she or he will turn out to be…..like the parents..
Normal kids start talking at 1 or 2…we start yelling at 8 months…Normal kids start walking carefully around the same age…we start jumping from the top of the stairs to arrive faster to the bottom…Want to hear where the baby is in the house????.. Normal kids have a special device put for them in every room to hear them….We don't need one, just follow the sound!…In the playground normal kids stay in their own space where their mother left them with their sand bucket….we finished our castle, destroyed another kids castle, ran around the play ground, and drove our mother or filipinno nanny crazy by going out of the park and in the middle of the road…
If we applied the "calming down" pill that Americans invented for their hyper active children to our kids…We wont have anymore kids….lol..
But the "Golden rule" does not always work.. There comes a time when a man has got to go.. He's got to go ...whether he has one kid or 30…
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